With STD’s growing at an alarming rate and whores popping up on every street corner, one has to wonder when the ever-so-illusive ladies of the night are going to start giving their “clients” the new and revolutionary “Spray-on Condoms” which German scientist Jan Vinzenz Krause, recently invented.
Spray-on Condoms, Huh? What the hell you on about…
Well, if you haven’t heard, don’t worry, I only found out about Spray-on condoms last night and I’m usually in the know about things like that, being the excessive gherkin jerker and the whore buying law abiding citizen I am.
The spray-on condom thingy-ma-jig measures your size (small, medium, large, extra-large, hung-like-an-elephant) and then sprays your penis with liquid latex after you press a button on the side. It takes about 20 seconds or so for it to dry and you can peel it off just like a normal condom.
Sounds to good to be true, right? Well, it all depends on what it takes to ruin the “mood” for you. It’s not exactly the most romantic item, in fact although the spray-on condom would remove the condon packaging issues, there would also be many more issues which you just don’t realise at first.
What issues am I talking about? Well.. Liquid latex is fairly hot so not only will your penis feel the heat, once the liquid latex has dried and your ready to go, you might experience some other problems too, such as; the liquid latex drying around your pubic hair, so when you peel it off, it pulls the hair out, and also when you ejaculate, where the hell is the sperm going to go if the liquid latex is moulded right to the head of your penis?
When the spray-on condoms are finally released, it will come to no surprise if whores add them to their bedside cabinets for use with their punters. So look-out next time you rent a whore for the evening because these spray-on condom device’s are reusable which means you’re going to be sticking your penis inside something which another 50 people have used.
Thoughts and comments in regards to this subject are appreciated.
July 7th, 2008 at 7:04 pm
you’re forgetting that you’d be stick your dick in something else 50 other men have used before as well
July 9th, 2008 at 12:05 pm
I’m not sure spraying molten latex onto your penis is such a good idea.
Not that there’s anything wrong with S&M…
July 10th, 2008 at 11:43 am
The pay-for-play business isn’t anything I’d get mixed up in, but I’d have to try ithe spray on at least once. Being a lady with an interest in gadgetry of all sorts and being kind of fond of latex, I would have to check it out. Imagine having a condom that fits YOUR package! No choking, slipping, gapping or short-sheeting! It’s latex, so it still protects from the buggies that membrane condoms let pass. You don’t have to be a pro to see some of the advantages here.
As a woman, it would rock to have something like this at the ready. No excuses from your partner, if nothing else. Picture this: “What? you don’t like the feel of the spray? Well, there are a couple of options, I guess; you could keep your preferred brand on you, or it’s you and Rosy Palm tonight.” Furthermore, it encourages good grooming. I win!
July 15th, 2008 at 4:42 am
A c’mon aspray on Condom?????
the world has truly gone mad
August 10th, 2008 at 9:23 am
talk to me supergeek!